YAWN at the Five Guys dead cow emporium opening where the Baja Fresh went stale and closed. Meat-a-vores generally prefer the patties at In-N-Out Burger, even if the Five Guys offer a better deep fried fry. Mmmm… midlife heart surgery. (Advocateers of the carnivorous variety just want Kel’s to come back… come on, we’re beggin’ here!)
PLOT THICKENS with why they asked… for “mishandling of serious allegations of sexual harassment” and a “stream of comments insinuating religious bias,”according to the Rabbis.
DOUBLE JEERS to said Linfield prez who at one point apparently said, “You don’t give Jews soap when you send them to the showers.” Or, as another witness heard it, “You don’t send Jews to the showers with soap.”[Insert serious WTF here]
TRIPLE DAMN JEERS because either way you heard him say that phrase, Miles K. says no way, he didn’t do it, but if he did (yes, we are not making this up)… He said, “But if I did I would certainly have attributed it…” Quote attribution is apparently very important to anti-Semites… who knew?
WE WAIT WITH BATED BREATH as fulltime classes resume at Corvallis schools on May 3. With variants popping up all over the globe, and making their way here to ORY-GUN, and no vaccine for tikes… what could possibly go wrong? Also, with little more than a month of school to go, what’s the point?
CHEERS for this riddle… What’s Oregon’s Democratic Senator Wyden have in common with Kentucky’s Republican Senator Rand Paul? It turns out that both wanna abolish the selective service, which they say costs taxpayers $25 million yearly, whilst there’s been no military draft since 1973. The bill is bicameral, also supported in the House by our very own Rep. Peter DeFazio along with a Rep. from Rhode Island named Rodney Davis, they’re flavored Democrat and Republican, respectively. If passed, this legislation will save each American enough to buy half a bean burrito at Taco Bell – and we did actually do the math on that, which probably says something about us, so yeah, just click to another story… Move along. Nothing to see here.