CHEERS & JEERS: Hot Dry Times, Meet Big Dollars

CHEERS for Beaver-folk not being so vector-y. In an about face, Oregon State University now says they’ll be requiring Covid vaccinations for students and staff come fall term. In late April, a university spokesman said they were leaning against requiring the shots, and we’re celebrating the shift. In related news… 

JEERS for the vaccines not doing as advertised. We were promised these vaccines would sterilize us, and it turns out they don’t, so we’re stuck still spending on birth control. The youngins, knowing that things yelled into microphones by angry-smug people aren’t always true, are already onto this. With “hot vax summer” trending on social media, condom sales have increased 23.4% so Trojan marketing chief (and we’re not making this name up) Britta Bomhard, tells CNN, “18 to 24-year-olds can’t wait to get their social lives back.” 

WE WAIT WITH BATED BREATH to see if the City approves a new $181 million budget. Because revenues have increased a bit, Corvallis is thinking to hire some new wastewater/stormwater help, and an equity and inclusion leader. Meetings are upcoming, and citizen-folk — which is you — can testify or observe… how to do that, and the budget, are here. 

CHEERS to Suraj Kulkarni, age 18, of Corvallis. Chosen as a top ten youth volunteer from a national pool of 21,000, the Corvallis High senior scores a $5,000 scholarship and some bling. Suraj’s thing: He created a website where young people of diverse backgrounds share their experiences and culture with one another — there’s also been online conferences which have involved young people from more than 13 countries. LOOK, we’re impressed we can barely get our staff in the same Zoom meeting at a set time. 

CHEERS for Prudential Financial and the National Association of Secondary School Principals presenting Suraj’s award, even if we’re a little uncomfortable because we don’t know who they are. 

JEERS to Polk County voters. We told you Mike Nearman was a racist hate group Board member, and our coverage made freaking national headlines for hells’ sakes, which means you can’t say you didn’t know. But y’all kept reelecting the guy to Oregon’s House anyway. Sooo… just last week he was CRIMINALLY CHARGED for kindly welcoming rightwing rioters into the State Capitol, for instance, opening a locked door for them… like, on video, even. Shamelessly, we say… “Told yuh so.” 

PLOT TWISTS: Oregon’s Democratic lawmakers wanna lock guns in containers and then put locks on their triggers, because loose guns kill folks. Republicans are like… wait, what if I need my gun really fast because the ex is trying to break into my house. Anyhoo, the Dems are in the majority, they’ve shot the bill to the governor’s desk, where she’s likely gotta a bead on signing it into law. Well, shoot! 

CHEERS to climate change not being real. Which means the National Weather Service is wrong, and three-fourths of Oregon isn’t heading into a drought this summer, and snowpack in the Malheur Basin in Eastern Oregon isn’t at some catastrophic low… Wait, is 12% of normal snowpack, like, really? That low? OMFG, now diggin’ out our AKs, cuz shiz just go real…and guns fix everything…and we’re already feeling a mighty thirst… and did the Guv already sign that gun-lock thing? [We are so f***ed] 

CHEERS for benefits buried in big budget bills, this one discounts your internet bill $50 a month if you’re on just about any kind of aid, and more if you’re living on tribal lands. You can apply starting on May 12. 

CHEERS to Tracey Fischer, a student teacher at Husky Elementary School from 15 years ago, she will take over as principal come July. Fisher spent the intervening years working at various district schools. Current principal, Anna Marie Gosser, will be retiring. According to one anonymous student, Fisher will be watched carefully, and cafeteria items need to include more pizza.. with more toppings. Said student, after being reminded, used the magic word — say it all together, kids — please! [Toby messed it up and said “it”] 

A FINAL NOTE: You probably know the District Attorney released a report last week that concludes the April 3 shooting  of Jeffrey Appelt by Corvallis police was justified. In our view, this conclusion is well supported by body cam video, and other information and evidence.  

The report is here. Alongside the power of death over life, there sits what is between the lines and what you may be led to feel about that — the stifling weight of the human condition, and our quite human desire to overcome that condition. In any event, like what we’ve said before, what happened on April 3 was tragic, however one looks at it.