CHEERS & JEERS: Corvallis Budgets, Corvallis Morals

CHEERS for an end signaling a beginning.  Local mass vax clinics end after June 10, which we assume means they served their purpose. Availability has largely moved to pharmacies and clinics. At 69.9% jabbed, we’re the most vaxxed county in the state! Corvallisites ROCK!! 

JEERS to the vaccines themselves. We were told there’d be microchips, but no such luck and gawd knows we could use a reboot after this last year. Also, they apparently don’t sterilize anyone either — well, at least not journalists. And now they’re telling us that the vaccines — based on mRNA — won’t even change our genetic makeup. Dagnabbit!  

CHEERS to the homeless camp cleanups by local authorities as we assume this means homelessness has largely been resolved. Our society leaves nobody behind! Everyone who wants a home, has a home… Mission accomplished!! 

PLOT TWIST: A recently renovated six bedroom Corvallis triplex on a pastoral half acre is being offered for sale at $550,000, which is $91,667 per bedroom. The PLOT THICKENS as the Reser Stadium makeover now sports a price tag of $324.5 million… that’s 3,540 bedrooms. INCIDENTALLY, there are fewer than 1,300 homeless men, women, and children in Benton County.  

JEERS to The Corvallis Advocate and Corvallis Gazette-Times for waiting about a week to report Corvallis’ Senator Sara Gelser is being sued by a prior aide. The plaintiff, Laura Hanson, said the work environment had become “emotionally toxic and abusive,” and she is claiming discrimination. We suspect the suit is malarkey, but the fact we missed reporting it is also malarkey. Our only excuse: We have less than a tenth of the GT’s dollars to work with, so we work REALLY long hours and just need some sleep. The GT’s excuse is anyone’s guess.  

CHEERS to Gelser bringing home the bacon, $4 million in aid for education, wildfire response, and infrastructure, among other goodies.  

WE WAIT WITH BATED BREATH as unemployment for April was dead-even with March, both countywide and statewide, the numbers remained 4.7 percent and 6.0 percent, respectively. What will tomorrow bring… 

CHEERS for Nancy Hirsch coming out of retirement, and taking over as Oregon’s state forester. The outgoing dude leaves amid unhappiness from both timber industry folks and environmentalists – and then there’s what happened in 2017, when the agency pressured another state agency to bury a report linking logging to water quality concerns. Anyhoo, with wildfire season upon us, you get the idea… Hirsch comes in at a time of total calm, a meditative moment, really. We can just imagine the phone call asking her to come back to the agency. 

CHEERS for Governor Brown’s belief that Oregonian’s can accept accountability for their choices, and understand nuance and be polite… all at the same time. We speak here of the idea that a business can offer patrons a maskless option if they’ll show a vax card. Nice thought Gov… but whole lotta nope from conservatives, and the businesses have largely given up even trying. We liked the governor’s plan…the idea of seeing smiles again… but yeah, everything is politics, so yeah… nice try.