Oregon Backwash

OHA, Kepro Play Tug of War in Game Where Mentally Ill are the Rope
A Pennsylvania-based “Comprehensive and Customizable Healthcare Management” company called Kepro just got wrecked by the Oregon Health Authority (OHA) on the grounds that they have been improperly discharging patients with severe mental illness. Why? Because they’re trying to run a facility here, ya’ll, and you can’t have patients that are worse than others mucking about!

The history here is as follows: Oregon offered Kepro a $27 million contract to come help rescue it from itself by swooping in and doing patient evaluations on 1,600 Oregonian mental health patients. And honestly, with a tagline like this – “Your needs are unique. So is KEPRO. Only KEPRO delivers holistic healthcare management fully customized to your needs” – well, it’s easy to be fooled, for sure!

Unfortunately, for those suffering with mental illness, there’s nothing unique about a company screwing them over. You can call this a situation of corporate greed, but if you ask the patients, they’re going to tell you that it’s equally likely to come down to old fashioned ignorance and incompetence. Believe me, I was in a masters-level counseling course the other day and you could taste the silver spoon white girl in the air. Argue about the DSM-5 classification of gender dysphoria as a disorder while actual trans people are in the room trying to tell you to shut the f*ck up? You know, because the classification made it possible for them to get insurance coverage for certain procedures? Check.

Aaaaanyway. So Kepro was hit by the OHA for 17 instances of naughtiness and have now officially dabbed on them for all 17.

(I don’t actually know what the hell dabbing on someone means, or if it even makes sense here. I asked my youngest roommate and she said “I’m 30! F*ck off. Go ask a kid.” Oh well.)

To give you a more specific example, one of the cases involved a schizophrenic woman in her 50’s who had been ousted from the Kepro site and was found “catatonic and severely dehydrated after wandering the streets for a week,” according to Oregonlive.

OHA says this, Kepro denies that, blah blah blah. Yeah, there’s a lot more to this, but you didn’t come to The Mighty Backwash for all that jibber-jabber. If you want a nuanced look at the scenario, there is plenty of reporting out there. On my end, I’ll wait to give a sh*t until I see some movement regarding something that might actually help someone. If you’ve ever had to seek mental health help, even with insurance, you know exactly what I’m saying.

Jeff Merkeley Threatens Trump on Twitter

And I bet he’s shaking in his loafers.

The story is that last week one of Oregon’s favorite government teddy bears, Jeff Merkeley, got on Twitter (because that’s the world we live in) and said “If this report of Trump suborning false testimony is confirmed, then Trump committed a felony and must resign or be impeached.” This is in reference to a “bombshell” report that went out Thursday saying that two members of Robert Mueller’s team were all like “Trump told Cohen to lie to Congress and stuff, and there’s a crapload of documents showing it.”

Woah. So, in terms of Trump shaking in his loafers, I only said that sarcastically because I think the guy is too dumb to know when he’s about to be the single living turd under a pile of dead turds trying to eat his way out.

While Merkeley was the first “youuuuu’re outttta heeeere!” out of the gate, he was joined shortly thereafter by Democrats Sen. Chris Murphy of Connecticut and Rep. Joaquin Castro of Texas.

If The Merks isn’t setting up some kind of run for greater office in the near future, he must just be running for “guy who actually does his job and seems to care and whatnot.” I’d vote for his plush, cuddly as*.

And Because You Like Violent Crime so Much (seriously, what’s wrong with you)
Someone off their rocker got stabby in a Hillsboro Taco Bell last week, wounding one employee and then getting inside a walk-in freezer and stabbed himself a bunch of times before the police arrived and tasered him.

Could be someone else Kepro discharged. Pure conjecture, of course.

Oregon Backwash is a barely-coherent satire with a teaspoon of white-knighting, a pinch of bald-faced lies, and dash of pooptalk. In other words, don’t take it too seriously – nobody here does; especially the author.

By Sam Campbell