Linn-Benton Backwash

Welp. No Christmas miracles this season, I’m afraid. Unless you count Magan McDermott of Albany feeding her infant methadone to help him get a few Zzzs late last month. But you don’t, because even though you’re dirt-baggy enough to read this column, you’re not quite on that level.

But yeah, no joke, the 34-year-old McDermott did just that, and though the baby had stopped breathing for quite some time, members of the Albany Fire Department gave him a dose of NARCAN, a substance used to halt opioid overdoses, and he was transported to a Portland hospital before being released a few days later. However, it was a few more days before the police caught McDermott, who had bailed at the first signs of trouble, leaving her son with her sister.

Previously, McDermott had lost custody of two older children of hers, and had a rap… wrap… turns out I don’t know how to spell it, but she had a rhap (the “h” is silent) sheet including instances of endangering minors, meth possession, and theft. I also read reports that one of her older children had died while in foster care, though none of them mentioned why.

It’d be easy to tear this scuzzball a new one, but this whole thing just makes me sad. What does it take to wind up like this in life? I can’t imagine losing a child. So, while it’s not a miracle by any stretch of the imagination, rather than being a jerk this week I’m just going to ask everyone to take it easy on those around them. Life is extremely hard, and it never really lets up. It certainly isn’t going to for McDermott; she’s currently got her bail set at 320,000 dollars, and is facing four felonies.

Linn-Benton Backwash is a barely-coherent satire with a teaspoon of white-knighting, a pinch of bald-faced lies, and dash of pooptalk. In other words, don’t take it too seriously – nobody here does; especially the author.


By Sam Campbell