Linn-Benton Backwash

linnbentonbackwash1When I first got up this morning, I had myself a nice panic attack and then proceeded to channel the cosmos for local happenings and general lollygagging. And here’s what I got for you… nothing. Yes, nothing, that lovable scamp that exists between complete boredom and absolute bliss. Depending on how old you are, anyway. I’m just on the other side of “leave me the hell alone, I just want to sleep.”

I was going to write to you about the power outage on campus, but naa. Make fun of people on the Gazette Times’ mugshot roll? Sorry, I’m a dick, not an as*hole. Talk about the sweet Raiders of the Lost Ark show at the Whiteside (that’s over by the time you read this… okay, maybe I am an as*hole)? How about the creeper that’s been walking around the 4th / 5th, Monroe and Madison blocks getting in peoples’ faces? He likely can’t help himself thanks to mental illness (I’d certainly know). I’ll let you know if he punches me in the future, though. I’m always looking out for you readers. Except for this week – you’re on your own.

What else is happening… some football stuff? Always. And now I’m out of words, so I guess you really are getting nothing this week. You should probably move to a place with more excitement and action – like Lebanon. Seriously, the police there serve like 50 warrants a week.

By Johnny