Open Source Improv, Cloud & Kelly’s Public House, 126 SW 1st St. 9 p.m. Free
I’ve seen these guys, and I can tell you, they’re pretty funny. Not Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton doing a pop & lock routine together while Jaden Smith provides a dubstep beat with his mouth funny, but pretty close. And short of asking for an even remotely complex order at most of the restaurants in town and then taking bets around the table on what will show up and how close to your order it will actually be, you won’t find a more amusing pastime in town. Certainly not this particular Thursday.
Rusty Hinges, Calapooia Brewing, 140 NE Hill St., Albany. 7:30 p.m. Free
Rusty Hinges, Rusty Hinges, Rusty Hinges. Didn’t expect to see you again so soon. Or did I? The weeks are blurring together. But apparently it’s been about a month since the last time I badgered you to go hang with one of Corvallis’ favorite Americana acts. Once again, they’re at the ‘Pooia and they’re playing for free. I sort of feel like you owe it to them at this point, but I could be totally wrong. I just found out my car is dead and I need to buy a new one, so I’m a little distracted. Also, climate change has been looming in my thoughts…
Rainbow in the Clouds, Cloud & Kelly’s Public House, 126 SW 1st St. 10:30 p.m. Free
It’s Corvallis’ only good dance party. Not counting the one I have at my house every night of the week. But you’re not invited to my house, so better get thee to Cloud’s for the party that’s got more pride than The Lion King. There will be DJs, colors, dancing, fun, light, love, I think raffles(?), and tons of other fun stuff. There aren’t even any really good shows in town this night, so this is standing alone as the thing to do. Let’s do this, Rainbow.
Mosley Wotta and Turntable Enabler, Bombs Away Café, 2527 NW Monroe Ave. 10 p.m. $5
Yeesh. This is awkward. I sort of just said there were no good shows in town this Friday night. But here’s Mosley Wotta and TE. I bet they’d beg to differ. I just don’t have it in me to get into a whole debate. So let’s just say there is this one really good show you could go to if you don’t want to go to Rainbow in the Clouds. Mosley Wotta is arguably Bend’s most famous rapper. Turntable Enabler is a staple of the local hip-hop scene. This is Oregon hip-hop, people.
Jeffrey Martin, Anna Tivel and Honey Don’t, Cloud & Kelly’s Public House, 126 SW 1st St. 10 p.m. Mystery pricing
Jeffrey Martin and Anna Tivel are back with another evening of folk music. They’re both pretty big on the national folk circuit, which means they frequently get into “beefs” with other big folk musicians and release diss tracks on their folk mixtapes. There’s a whole side to this genre you probably didn’t know about… And they’ll be joined by the lovely Colorado duo Honey Don’t. This is a bona fide show-of-the-week contender here.
Ted Vaughn Blues, Calapooia Brewing, 140 NE Hill St., Albany. 8 p.m. Free
Yes for unpretentious blues. A thousand times yes. Ted Vaughn Blues Band is the genuine thing, and Calapooia is a perfect venue for them. Get your booze and blues on at Albany’s favorite place for such things. Ted Vaughn sort of looks like the John Carpenter of Northwest blues bands, if that means anything to you. And it should, because I’m pretty sure The Fog took place around here, didn’t it? Sorry, now I’m just not even trying. Go to this show.
Black Swan Classic Jazz, Episcopal Church of the Good Samaritan, 333 NW 35th St. 3 p.m. Free
This is the last show in a lovely series called Concerts at 3. I have no idea why they chose to call it that, but the show starts at—oh my god, I just got it. Anyway, this show looks great. BSCJ is a fantastic group and they’ll be bringing together musicians from Montana, Oregon, and Washington for some classic jazz. As much as you may be used to trying to get out of church on Sunday, this is a great reason to get in. Just don’t be surprised if they’re really nice to you. It makes it hard to make fun of them and ridicule their beliefs when you meet them and they’re cool.
Blues Jam, Calapooia Brewing, 140 NE Hill St., Albany. 4 p.m. Free
Wow, speaking of un-pretentious blues at the ‘Pooia. This is some crazy-unpretentious blues from a bunch of people who really just love to play. And it’s free, other than the hundreds of dollars you’ll no doubt spend on beer. I’ve been thinking of actually jumping on stage and playing with them one of these Sundays. Because I’m a jerk and I want them to fail, you see…
Early Bird Jazz Band, Imagine Coffee, 5460 SW Philomath Blvd. 7:30 p.m. Free
I didn’t do a tremendous amount of research here, in fact, I sort of phoned it in for Memorial Day—you know, in honor of the troops. So someone will have to jump in here and correct me if I’m wrong, but I think this is a middle school jazz band. I think this is a bunch of kids from Linus Pauling Middle School playing jazz. I’m so on board for that it’s not even funny. Forget you, Science Pub. At least this month. This is your show of the week. Kids and jazz always works. It’s like the opposite corollary of making movies with kids. If only we could get animals to play jazz music, I’d be in heaven.
Science Pub, Old World Deli, 341 SW 2nd St. 6 p.m. Free
It’s another installment of Corvallis’ smartest night of entertainment. OK, to be clear, if we’re being incredibly technical and taking my words at their words, the smartest night of entertainment in town is doing literally anything with me, on any given night. But in a distant second is Science Pub. This week they’re tackling the always fascinating subject of marijuana. So feel free to get totally blunted and then get some knowledge inserted directly into your mind-hole at Old World Deli. Also, get pastrami, and turkey… and ham and a bunch of other stuff on a comically overstuffed sandwich so everyone knows you’re an… ahem—expert—in the study of marijuana. Also, am I crazy? Or is it sort of two-thousand-and-late to be making jokes about getting stoned any time someone mentions the word marijuana, even in a scholarly context. And don’t get me started on typing the words “two thousand and late.”
Community Movie Night with Ygal Kaufman, Darkside Cinema, 215 SW 4th St. 7 p.m. Free
Betty Hutton returns to the screen at CMNYK for another madcap night of laughs in the wonderful comedy The Stork Club (1945). Also, since it was released the year we won the war, buckle up for some epic newsreels and a great cartoon before the show. Oh, and not for nothing, but there’s also this cosmically f*cking awesome live band that plays music with a short film before every show. They’re be there, too, so, you know, if you’re not there, I hate your face. It’s free, you goons.
Celtic Jam, Imagine Coffee, 5460 SW Philomath Blvd. 7:30 p.m. Free
Speaking of free events for goons, it’s Celtic Jam. I kid, this event couldn’t be less goony. A bunch of really fun and awesome people play Irish music for free every week. You think every city has a bunch of dedicated locals like this? They don’t. And I lived in Cleveland for a long time, so you know I know what I’m talking about when I make broad generalizations about cities. Oh, you don’t? Yeah, I’m not sure I really had a point there, but I can certainly tell you that this is a fun and lovely night of free music at one of the best coffee spots in town. I love Celtic Jam at the ‘Gine. Even though I never get to go.
Hex Partners and Oso, Temple of Tooth. 6 p.m.
Corvallis DIY is back with another punk show and this time, to make things interesting, it’s sort of on the DL. Hex Partners are in from Nova Scotia and Oso is from Salem. And Temple of Tooth, in case you hadn’t already googled it, is a house somewhere in town. If you want to go to this show you’re going to have to do a bit of work, but I think you’ll find it a rewarding experience. Hex Partners are a weird and very Canadian mix of goth, folk, metal, punk, and fairy magic. And Oso is an off-shoot of Adieu Caribou, a local punk mainstay. This show is going to be full of angst. I can’t wait.
Wagon Wheel Wednesdays, Impulse Grill, 1425 NW Monroe Ave. 9 p.m. Free
Wagon Wheel Wednesdays are my favorite night of wagon-wheel pasta and Wednesday Addams cosplay in town. And Impulse is my favorite place for such an event. I especially like that this comes right after Timber Tuesdays, when you can get half-priced cocktails with names inspired by logging and forestry themes and Tuesday Weld cosplay. If you’re still reading this, you’ve got to be questioning some things at this point and taking a long look in the mirror. I’m just saying…
Pit Folk, Bombs Away Café, 2527 NW Monroe Ave. 9:30 p.m. Free
Pit Folk is a kind of fun Americana fusion act in from Philadelphia and you’re not going to catch me saying this, almost ever, but go to this Americana show. Pit Folk does not suck. And I’m not at all burned out on their sound that is a heavier, darker blend of indie, Americana, alternative, and a grab bag of other influences. They’re currently touring the Pacific Northwest, and let’s face it, realistically they may never be here again. So take the opportunity and check out this fun East Coast band while they exist.
Wild Hog in the Woods, Calapooia Brewing, 140 NE Hill St., Albany. 7:30 p.m. Free
Alright, f*ck it. Let’s just make it an Americana Thursday. It’s Wild Hog; music “totapatoeto.” You may recognize these guys as the ones who forebodingly warned you not to “stick your nose where it don’t belong” as you first drove into town. And while there are still plenty of unanswered questions regarding missing tourists and the decaying body smell coming from Albany, these gents do legitimately play good Americana music. And this show is free, so what can I tell you? Roll the dice on being the subject of a future season of Making a Murderer.