Acoustic Open Mic Night, Imagine Coffee, 5460 SW Philomath Blvd. 7 p.m. Free
This acoustic jam sesh is one of many local outlets for musicians to get on stage and it’s brought to us by the fine ‘Gine folks in conjunction with Ralph Penunuri, a local musician and musical bringer-togetherer. Is this the open mic night for you to dust off your yodeling chops? Probably not, because please remember, you’re the worst. But everyone else, this is definitely the open mic night for you. See what I did there? I’m fostering a healthy atmosphere of self-hatred and doubt that will inevitably lead you to become a better musician. You’re welcome.
DJ Keyst1, Bombs Away Café, 2527 NW Monroe Ave. 9 p.m. Free
Yikes, I can’t even sound remotely intelligent while describing the music of a DJ like Keyst1 in a short space like this. What I do know is that he was a top five finalist in a competition for best college DJ that aired on ESPN. He’s basically Corvallis’ favorite son, so it would be utterly bananas for you to not go check out his show, or DJ set, or whatever the proper term for it is. It will undoubtedly be the t1ts, and a gr8 time, if I understand the genre correctly…
Corwin Bolt, Calapooia Brewing, 140 NE Hill St., Albany. 8 p.m. Free
Corwin Bolt is one of Eugene’s more intriguing and enjoyable Americana acts, so getting to see him and the boys for free is a treat and a half. You know, when you write a column like this one for long enough, you start to wonder if there even is anyone out there reading. Have they kept count of how many times I’ve described something as a treat? Did I need to try and mix things up by adding “and a half” on the end of it this time? Am I getting everything I can out of this life? These are just the kind of deep thoughts a person could think while enjoying a reasonably priced beer at this awesome show. And then I would close out with some pun based on the name Bolt. Maybe something like, “You’ll need to bolt yourself to your chair to keep from dancing!” Yes, I know I’m a terrible person who is going to hell.
Crow and the Canyon, Bombs Away Café, 2527 NW Monroe Ave. 10 p.m. $5
I’m not sure what it is about Corvallis that attracts so many folk and string bands. And I don’t know what it is about folk and string bands that attracts the band-name formation of _____ and the _____. But what can I tell you? The ______ and the ______ are in town from ______ to play Americana music. Their biggest influences are ______, _______, and Woody Guthrie. But seriously, C and the C are just alright with me. If this is your type of show, this is definitely going to be a good one. These Portlanders are heading out for a national tour, so now’s a good time to catch them before they ride horses off into the sunset or turn into a flock of crows flying into the dusk light or whatever the hell Americana bands do when they leave the stage.
61st Annual OSU Lu’au, LaSells Stewart Center, 875 SW 26th St. 5 p.m. $5 to $13
The OSU Pacific Islander Club is putting on their yearly party of delicious food and fun stage show to celebrate their heritage. I’ll be putting on my yearly two-day fast before the event because I plan to eat. This may be the crowning jewel in the many OSU heritage festivals, and I’m certainly not going to miss it. Now if you are trying to get a seat at a less busy type of cultural event, I’ll be hosting an event where we cook food in my family’s tradition. And then we all yell at each other and get annoyed and eat way too much. Also in my family’s tradition.
Spiller and Era Coda, Bombs Away Café, 2527 NW Monroe Ave. 9 p.m. Free
Some mixed-genre rockiness is on the menu for this particular end of Shabbos. You all observe the Shabbos, right? I’m not the only Jew in Corvallis… am I? Oh my god, this sounds like the excellent set-up to a campy horror flick. But back to the matter at hand. Spiller and Era Coda are in from around the state to play the rock. This is a very good opportunity for some of you to see amplifiers for the first time. They’re these boxy machines that the folk musicians plug their dulcimers into to metamorphose into le rock. Never you mind, you’ll love it. And it’s free.
Willamette Apprentice Ballet On with the Dance, Majestic Theatre, 115 SW 2nd St. 7:30 p.m. $10 to $15
Ballet is somewhat of an acquired taste. By which I mean, if you haven’t yet acquired it, you’re a big dummy. The talented bunch at WAB is helping you to be less of a dummy by providing locally choreographed ballet to the music of Delibes, Tchaikovsky, and more. There will be guest dancers and other surprises in store. I hope you’re reading this blurb in an excited tone of voice in your head, and not in a Ben Stein-ian monotone just because it’s ballet. Because again, don’t be a dummy. Also, they’re dancing on Friday and Saturday nights as well, so you have multiple chances not to be a dummy this weekend.
Choral Evensong, Episcopal Church of the Good Samaritans, 333 NW 35th St. 3 p.m. Free
I’m not sure I know what I’m talking about when it comes to this event, so I’m just going to do my best. If I understand it correctly, Choral Evensong is a type of church service marked by lots of singing and an afternoon start time. I’m not sure if it’s also the name of some musical group who will be leading it, but I know just enough to be interested and don’t know just enough to be intrigued. This musical experience, part of the church’s Sundays at 3 concert series, promises to be glorious, classical, and full of praise. Just like me. Oh wait, no, nothing like me. Sorry, I got carried away there.
Becky’s New Car Auditions, Majestic Theatre, 115 SW 2nd St. 7:30 p.m. Free
I’ve tried this before, and I honestly haven’t got a clue how it worked out. But here I am trying to get a straight-up flash mob going at a Majestic audition. Let’s all go audition for this delightful-looking new production at our favorite local stage and see how it goes. We might be giving the director a wide range of talented actors to choose from, thus improving the play and contributing to local art. Worst case scenario we all waste each other’s time and humiliate ourselves. Wow, actually now that I see it typed out, the stakes are pretty high. See you all there!
Bryson Skaar, Imagine Coffee, 5460 SW Philomath Blvd. 7 p.m. Free
If you’re less inclined to potentially embarrass yourself than you are to see free jazz piano by a bright-eyed local, you are semi in luck. I mean, you’re definitely going to see the jazz piano and bright-eyed, not to mention bushy-tailed, local tickling the ivories. But again, no promises on you not getting embarrassed. I might choose to just sidle up next to you and start singing loudly along to whatever song Bryson is playing. Then everyone will look over in our direction, and I’ll just throw an arm around you and keep on going. I’m a pretty good friend that way.
Community Movie Night with Ygal Kaufman, Darkside Cinema, 215 SW 4th St. 7 p.m. Free
It’s a very special #CMNYK (stop me if you’ve heard this one before) as we screen Japanese master Kenji Mizoguchi’s masterpiece, Osaka Elegy (1936). It’s a moving and brilliant portrayal of the hardships of modern life and a woman’s sacrifices to save her family. It’s in Japanese with English subtitles, and I’ll be there with a box of Kleenex for you and a film school brochure for your teenage child should you choose to bring them to this screening and discover to your shock and chagrin that they get inspired to seek out a life in the cinema.
Celtic Jam, Imagine Coffee, 5460 SW Philomath Blvd. 7 p.m. Free
The Cletics are jammin’ right now. In every sense. Notre Dame made it pretty deep in the tournament, the boys in Boston are headed to the playoffs, and this group of a*s-kicking local musicians is still showing up every week to play Irish music for free. That’s literally music to my ears. Or at least it would be if I could ever go, but I’m always at Community Movie Night. So I guess not “literally” at all. My bad. Writing!
Lyrics Born and Gift of Gab, Cloud & Kelly’s Public House, 126 SW 1st St. 9 p.m.
Oh hi there, two legendary MCs hitting up probably the smallest venue either of them have ever played in the middle of Oregon on a Wednesday night. How the hell does a show this big even happen? Cloud is down with some serious talent, apparently. Gift is the legendary voice of hip-hop group Blackalicious, and Lyrics Born is a heavy hitter from the East Bay who’s been around forever. You are presumably a person who goes to shows without a banjo on stage, but that’s a possibly terrible assumption on my part.
Wups and Mr. Bones, Bombs Away Café, 2527 NW Monroe Ave. 9 p.m. $2
Fabulous. My favorite band in town, Wups, is playing a rager with the also-terrific Mr. Bones to raise money for the OSU Food Pantry. All the money raised at this show will be donated to the pantry, which does good things for people who need it. So feel free to dig a little deeper for—I don’t know—maybe a third dollar? It’s for a good cause, ya cheapskate. Maybe next year we can get this worthy event scheduled opposite a smaller act across town. Like Chamillionaire.
The Albert Square, Hi Ho Silver, Away! and Adieu Caribou, Interzone, 1563 NW Monroe Ave. 7 p.m.
Corvallis DIY, my favorite purveyors of punk in the state, are back with more shows. This time they’re bringing in The Albert Square from San Jose to rock some faces off. Fair warning: these guys rep the ‘Zae hard. Do not make fun of San Jose, or make denigrating remarks about the Sharks. These dudes do not find it funny. They’ll be supported by one of my genuinely favoritest local acts, Hi Ho Silver, as well as Adieu Caribou. I’m not sure if this show is free or not, but frankly, I don’t care. Please take this check. I’ve filled out all the important parts and left the amount blank. That should cover things, right?
Wilhelmina, Imagine Coffee, 5460 SW Philomath Blvd. 7 p.m. Free
We’ve covered young up-and-coming phenom Wilhelmina Frankzerda before. And she’s back at the ‘Gine without her partner (with whom she makes up the band Paper Wings) but, and I’m only assuming here, with her violin. She’s a star in the making, and someday you’ll be mortgaging your scooter for tickets to her sold-out show at Reser Stadium. For now, you can still elbow your way past some ornery locals to see her for free. Live in the now.